Chapter 158: I've never achieved anything by holding back

How lame am I to write two blogs within hours of each other? But you see there are several factors playing into this. The first is that I thought I was done, but usually when I vent at work I find that I’m not done. Because venting is venting, it’s not an update on anything, it’s not expressing my opinions on things that matter beyond this limited scope of work. The other thing is that my boss has decided to take a PTO day, and with that I have taken a mental day. So while I’ll be sitting in this work station for 8 hours, I won’t necessarily be working the whole time. Finally, Tyrant wants to meet for lunch, and she does lunch late, which doesn’t matter since Boss Lady is out, but I have more time than usual to kill before my lunch hour.

With that, I continue. I got an e-mail (after my venting) from my sister giving me information about A&W, the missionary in my parent’s ward. I know, I know, missionaries are so young, but as one sister told another in this e-mail (three of us e-mail each other constantly every work day) I go for the young ones. The other night the missionaries randomly show up at my parent’s house, well, not randomly, as it turns out they made an appointment with my dad – but since he forgot it felt pretty random. They talked to us for a bit, shared a little lesson with us, and then we prayed to close it all out. Afterwards A&W asked me if I was headed back to school this fall. Sadly, no, thanks for reminding me that I have been expelled from the ageless vacuum of college life and am now spinning rapidly towards the black whole of the rest of my life. Then Beans says, “When did you graduate?” like it was such a ridiculous thing for A&W to think I was still in college. Uh…two years ago jerk face. Then dad thinks I graduated high school in 2000, “2001.” I correct because I need all the time I can get.
Anyway, so back to the e-mail from my sister, here’s what it said:

Yeah, so A&W said he asked you about school. He thinks you look younger than you are. He asked if you left the singles ward, cause he heard a lot of people were getting tired of it and leaving. I said guys aren’t asking girls out and they are frustrated. He didn’t understand what was wrong with them. He said you should come out to Utah, plenty of guys out there to date?!?!? He is a cutie Honey, and we all know you like them younger?!?!?!?

The thing I love about my sister’s e-mails is when she is excited or proud of what she has just written she follows up with this - ?!?!?!?! What the heck does that mean? Is she asking in surprise? Is she uncertain that what she said is true? Is it a separate sentence, a question of “can you believe it?” I always get conflicting statements with it tagged on so I guess I’ll never be able to tell. But just to cover the biggest thing in this e-mail, “He thinks you look younger than you are.” 25 is not that old….right? Anyway, flattered and blushing that they spoke about me behind my back (because believe it or not there are people out there like me who would love it if more people spoke behind their back…good or bad, let the rumors fly), before I could respond my other sister…the Older Sister (or O.S.) writes back, “Oohhhh, a missionary concerned about your dating life…interesting.” So I write back, that I do look younger than I am because I’m incredibly immature (as discussed with Moxie last night that maturity is really just when you grow to be more boring). I told her that he is cute and I do like them younger, and that I was flattered he asked about me. But then I threw in that I can’t move to Utah just to get a date, but if he wants to come back here and take me on a date I’m okay with that.

She writes back that she wishes I had come over for dinner Friday when she had the missionaries over. Then she tells me his schedule, like they are BFF or something. His last day is today, his family picks him up tomorrow and they are going to sight see for a week, visiting some of the wards he’s served in on Sunday and she tells me he might be back in September with some friends and if not then definitely next May. Then she informed me that she told him that I call him A&W and why! Wait…maybe I should say, “and why?!?!?!?!” Just to tease her even though she doesn’t read this. I write back sarcastically that she should just tell him I think he’s cute while she’s at it. She writes back, “He thought it was cute. And I could tell him if you want me to?!?!?!?!” I’m not even kidding about her overuse of the question mark and exclamation point. Half of me wanted to tell her to go ahead, if she sees him again tell him I think he’s cute. I mean, what do I have to lose anyway? Instead I wrote back that I didn’t want her to tell him, it’s why I tagged on the end of my last e-mail that I was being sarcastic.