Chapter 171: Warning this is not a joke.

It’s another purge session. I think I will try to make this the last one.

We’re going to go with the three strikes rule of baseball on this one. So I have three strikes to report, I’ll try to stick to the topic and not digress too much.

Strike One - Sunday Night

Bull came over to play games but before she got there Moxie had come down to talk to me. This brought Pack Rat and SFHB into the mix…don’t know how, but suddenly they were there. So by the time that Bull arrived everyone was in my room talking. We didn’t even end up playing games because we kept talking. At some point SFHB and Pack Rat leave. Moxie went and got her computer and then came back down to my room and Bull, Moxie and I were hanging out. We closed the door so that we could make up our super cool, secret club, The Trifecta, inspired by Coz. So there we are, hanging out, with the door closed and in comes SFHB. No knock, she just walked right in. I think I have mentioned before that my room is not a commons area, you can not walk through to throw away the trash or to grab the recycling bin, and now I feel I must include that you can’t just open a closed door and walk in. It doesn’t work that way.

So she comes in and says, “Are you guys talking about me?” like she doesn’t actually think we would be…but we would be. Someone says “no” don’t know who did though, could have been me. She sits next to Moxie and looks on Moxie’s computer! She says, “I’m just going to be nosey.” I think next time I should say, “And I’m just going to be rude, get out.” Were any of the rest of us looking at her computer? No! My bedroom is it’s own country….January, and January has certain embassies…the September Embassy for Moxie and then the Visitor embassy for those guests in my room who are not roommates. There is no SFHB embassy, so I won’t let her terrorize the guest of the other embassies in January.

I couldn’t help though, but remember when SFHB used to do that stuff to me. She still does, but not as much. I told Moxie she can’t stand for it now, it will only get worse. I had been chatting with Moxie over the internet too and I had to stop because SFHB was looking at her screen! It ticked me off to no end!

After Moxie left to go to bed Bull and I were still working on some fun things in my room and Bull was telling me some stories and suddenly there’s SFHB. She enters with her Sunday school teacher voice and starts telling us stories about her family, like I give a damn. It’s just plain rude, does she honestly think the world revolves around her? I didn’t want to hear her stories so I stared at my iTunes, because I wouldn’t have the word document up on my computer detailing The Trifecta…I didn’t want her to see it, it’s none of her damn business.

Strike Two – Monday Night

Monday was Labor Day and Pack Rat and SFHB went out of town. Moxie and I went to FHE Monday night and when I came home from FHE Pack Rat and SFHB were just getting home. I pulled up into the driveway and SFHB starts to walk towards me. I say, aloud, “No you can not slut face,” or something similar to that referring to her coming through my room. That’s another thing that annoys me and I have a feeling you already knew that. Well it turns out that my back windows were still rolled down, but she didn’t act like she heard me so I didn’t say anything about it. When I parked I parked next to her car, even though I refused to conform, I did. It’s what the slut wanted and now I’m doing it, mostly to prove the point that it’s the stupidest idea ever, there’s barely any room between the cars and her door hit mine last night so I threw a little mini fit so she would get the idea. Anyway, so she walks up and blocks my way. She stands at between my back car door and her back car door like a slipping idiot. I’m trying to get to my back seat to pull stuff out of the car and she’s just standing there. I don’t think it’s funny but apparently she does, though she wasn’t laughing, and she says, “I guess I’ll have to take the garbage can to the curb in the morning. I can’t squeeze it between our cars. And all I said was, “Yeah, guess so.” Make up your mind, you want to prove that two cars can fit or you don’t want two cars to park there! I don’t want two cars to park there, but I feel like I should be able to park by the door that leads directly into my room. That’s just me and we all know that I’m a brat.

Besides, taking the garbage out to the curb is my job! I don’t know why she’s started to take it over. It’s like she wants to be the one in charge of everything, she wants to be the one who makes sure garbage and recycling get out because apparently the rest of us can’t be trusted to do it. I don’t know why it’s making me so angry because frankly I shouldn’t care about it at all! Grr!!

Strike Three – Tuesday Night

Moxie came down to my room to talk…to me…last night. Did she go to SFHB who was in the bathroom and talk to her? No! But I can hear the quiet hum of SFHB’s toothbrush and I know that she will either be following Moxie into my room or interjecting at some point. (P.S. I hate when she throws out her hand and says, “Wait!” and then interrupts. I want to look at her one of these times and say, “You were never even invited into this conversation!”) What do you know? She interjected something into our conversation, probably the same way I just described but I can’t remember. I wanted to ask her why the hell she thinks its okay to join in people’s conversations!

I got a movie in the mail yesterday and she asked me what movie I got, so all I said was, “Of your mom.” She kept looking at my movies too; no doubt trying to figure out which one was new, but I wouldn’t answer the question. It was “I Am Legend”. But I wouldn’t give her the satisfaction of knowing.

Wait I’m confused now because last night Moxie and I were sitting on the couch talking and the door was closed, so either she’s did this stuff twice to me yesterday or her humming toothbrush, walking in story was from Monday. Now that I’ve cleared that up, the walking into my room which had a closed door and trying to pump even simple useless knowledge from me was yesterday. Next time she opens my door without knocking I’m going to ask her if I can help her with anything because obviously she thinks she’s walking into some office. Or maybe I’ll start just walking into her bedroom door, though I don’t want to go anywhere near her room. When she says, “No, why?” I’ll say, “Oh, I’m sorry, I assumed it was something important since you rudely came into my room without knocking first.”

I wonder if it’s because I have a glass door that she can see right through. Maybe if I had a wood door she wouldn’t do that. Maybe I can put up a sign on my door that says, “Please knock, I’m tired of being disrespected.” And then underneath that in not much smaller print, “Knocking does not guarantee admittance.” The best thing is, my door is glass so I can look to see who is knocking and if it is her I can walk away without opening it. She would laugh and open the door and I would say, “That wasn’t a joke, get out.”