Chapter 58: Ramblings on Dating

Maybe I’m not Elizabeth Bennett, because when I think about it I have to wonder where my Mr. Darcy is. Maybe I’m Charlotte Lucas. I’m waiting for some attractive, endearingly shy, wealthy man to enter into my life and find himself uncontrollably attracted to me despite his better judgment, when really I should be thinking about what is reasonable, what catch could I actually get living in Richmond, VA. Charlotte knew her limitations; she knew that it wasn’t likely that she would marry for love. So the question is, do I die a spinster or do I make an attempt to find some ounce of happiness with someone who isn’t one I expect to find story book love with.
Jane Austin has disillusioned me, that sly dog. I didn’t fall for Disney’s fairytale endings, but Jane manipulated me, she made me think that there was a chance of happily ever after despite all the worldly handicaps that life endowed you with. That’s not how it goes though because people are merely humans, in a fallen state, and therefore their perceptions of each other are in a fallen state. There is a scarcity of people who can see the inner beauty and an even smaller amount of people who even bother trying. Men wait for airbrushed models to come walking into their lives one day, failing to understand that the model probably has no interest in them even if she did enter their lives through some delirious twist of fate, what makes them special enough to get her attention?
I’m not saying that guys are the only ones who fall subject to this delusion; women are just as much affected. We women fall in love with the idea of a man and his character, not always just his physical attributes, and adding in character makes it a little harder to compete with. Just watch any chick flick and find out for yourself, how does the man act? Do real men act with the same decorum as leading male characters from any given chick flick? My very own Mr. Darcy is simply proof that women fall for this too. There is no Mr. Darcy, and I’m pretty sure the reason is simply because “courting” is a lost art. Since it is lost I can not say with certainty what it involves, having no opportunity to see it myself. But I’ll go on some assumptions here, I assume that courting involves showing interest in only one girl at a time, how are you supposed to prove your interest if you are jumping around from girl to girl, she will think of herself as nothing more than a friend to you. The whole theory of not putting all your eggs in one basket was never intended for courting, and yet, that’s what men seem to do these days.
The girls who usually get the guy are the ones with enough courage and confidence to go after the guy, and sadly in the dating game it is the men who are supposed to be the hunters, not the hunted, but they seem okay with prancing in front of the hunters and seeing which one takes the first shot.
Again, I know nothing of what courtship really is because no one has been able to provide me with at least one experience of it. But it’s just a thought.