Chapter 57: Pathways

So I got a new job. Did I even mention here that I had applied for one? Well, I did and I wanted it, and I got the offer for it yesterday. So today I needed to turn in my two weeks notice. It was bittersweet, my excitement was tinged with remorse. I felt bad, certainly, I knew what my leaving in two weeks would do to my team members, they’d have to make up the difference of being a trainer short. I was scared to death how my manager would take it too, I was scared she’d get angry. So of course I prayed before I entered the office that she wouldn’t be angry and I came to find out that I fear more when someone is sad or disappointed, I think I’d rather deal with anger. I felt so bad, but at the same time I felt a huge release, as much as I actually did like the job it wore me down quickly and made me unhappier than I had realized. I just hope that this new job isn’t something that seems like a job I can and want to do and then turns out to be some horrible death trap, like in The Nanny Diaries. She thought her future employer was great in the interview process and thought that the job would be great and as it turned out her employer was a bitch and the kid was a brat. I hope that doesn’t happen at this job, I really did like the people I met and I find it difficult to fathom that the positive attitudes they had conveyed could all be false.
Anyway, back to the quitting the old job part, when I went in to see my manager I ran into one of the other trainers (who I don’t think has a nickname so let’s call him Twitch). Twitch, as usual asked what I was doing there upon seeing me, I said I was there to talk to our manager and he walked with me to the back office. Then he asked again why I was there. I showed him the envelope with my manager’s name on it and he put it together rather quickly and said, “You’re quitting.” Then he told me how he was taking some tests in November for some police department and how TDH had applied for marketing position within the company. We gave each other high five because to be honest we all know the current job is not a good long time position. Twitch did mention how he was surprised that I was the first one and I mentioned my gratitude for being the first one, I wouldn’t want to be at the tail end of all the trainers quitting. I did apologize though, and he said not to because we have a new part time trainer and I thought about the other two part time trainers who with their mixed availability could certainly make up my hours. I feel certain that TDH will know of my quitting by the time we see each other tomorrow. It’s been fun working with such an attractive and funny young man, and I will miss working with him, but I feel pretty certain that I won’t really remember him that well in a couple of months time, he’ll just be some cute guy I used to work with…and I think I’m okay with that.
All in all it wasn’t as painful as I thought it would be and I took a big sigh of relief after it was all said and done. I even took the day off, though I should have worked, but seriously after quitting what’s the point in driving from store to store to visit…except to say ‘goodbye’, and to be honest there aren’t that many store managers I’m close enough with to even bother doing so. Two maybe three of my stores, and I can grab those later this week sometime.
I came home and I started to read this incredible book and I started it today and I’ve already read almost 300 pages, it’s that good. In fact Ducky and I were hanging out tonight and around 8pm we both started reading (because you see we bought the book together last night so we both have a copy and in a way it’s our little book club) and Ducky set an alarm for midnight so we would know that we couldn’t read anymore. It was crazy, we didn’t intend to read for four hours but the time just flew by with this book. I’m worried that if I don’t finish it I won’t be able to concentrate on much else.
Ducky and I also went to visit a friend, well, at least someone we would like to consider a friend. She is so funny and the only person who has put pressure on me to come up with a nickname for her, and not all too surprising, being forced to come up with a nickname for someone makes it all the more difficult. It’s one thing to be typing about someone and then say, “Oh, yeah, let’s call him/her this name, it just seems to fit them,” which is what I’ve pretty much done. So one day I’ll have a nickname for her. I was hoping that by typing about our visit with her that I would be able to come up with one, but sadly it’s not flowing through my thoughts right now.