Venting

I need a place to vent.

I need to move really. I've got Chris (basketball man) constantly e-mailing me, slowly leading me towards a question I don't want to be headed towards (asking me out). Then there is NTR who just won't let up and then despite the fact that I told him he can't come to me with his problems he sent me a message today asking me for advice on girls. Dude, I will not be your therapist I'm already screwed up enough as it is. NTR also decided to comment on about 13 of my photos today on Facebook...all within the same hour. So B2 thinks it would be funny to send me a message about my "new friend", NTR. Ha. Ha. My sides are splitting. (Sarcasm). I'm reading The Serial Killers Club and surprisingly it makes me want to connect with someone, it makes me feel lonely in way and I didn't think that this book would do it. I also hate the narrator, I hope I'm meant to hate him because I do. He's cocky, self-righteous and doesn't seem to realize how annoying he is. But I guess annoying people never notice how annoying they are.

But that's not what I need to privately vent about. What I need to privately vent about is that people just let me down, they always do and I'm wondering if there is anyway that I can avoid having that happen. because when people let you down, they disappoint you and no matter how hard you try you're still disappointed, you're still a smidgen upset. I don't want to be disappointed in people. I don't want to care about it that much.

Bull was supposed to help me out tomorrow and I e-mailed her on Monday to double check that she still could and she didn't e-mail me back, until today, after I contacted her sister to see if she was still alive. The e-mail was negative, which I prepared myself for after the first 24 hours of not hearing back from her. She's swamped, just got thrown on her today. It's fine to be busy, it's fine to have to back out, it's not fine to lie to me and I'm pretty good at being able to tell when I'm hearing an excuse that isn't completely truthful. Yes, she may be swamped at work, but she knew about it before today.

It's not like it's even a big deal, I'll make the stuff tonight for tomorrow and it's not a big deal. It's almost better that I am doing it, but how am I supposed to respond to that e-mail? I'm supposed to lie of course, because being polite involves some sort of lie every now and then.

Also, I think like a guy, I'm not here to listen to your problem just for the sake of letting you get it off your chest, I'm thinking, "Okay, now how can we fix this?" I try not to think that way, but I can't help it, I'm not good with sympathy.