Chapter 149: The Cake Sampler and the Timid Shopper

It’s like I feel I need to get more material and then the heavens open and bam, material.
So after I wrote this afternoon I was talking to my friend at work, we’ll call her Home Girl (HG) because the boys in her department always go up to her and ask her to get the hook up from her girl (referring to me and my amazing HR capabilities). So Home Girl it is…either that or Home Slice but now I’m distracting myself.
So I told Home Girl of some dating woes I’ve been going through. She’s married, and married people like to hear this kind of stuff. She chided me concerning B2 (Who’ve I’ve decided to call McFlirty) because months ago she warned me about him. She doesn’t know him but she knows his type. The Cake Sampler.
The Cake Sampler
The guy who wants to know all about his options as well as all of his options before he settles on just one type of cake. (Yes, I laughed about this because of the blog I wrote recently about guys being Bakers). They go around tasting all different types of cakes and the girls (who are the samples) put up with it because they think that maybe this time they aren’t a sample, maybe they’re the whole cake. And yes, HG and I really did have this conversation sitting back in Dilbert’s empty cubicle watching the pond outside the window. Then she went on about how Cake Samplers run the risk of getting cavities and I’m sitting there thinking, no wonder she’s my BFF at work, we think so much alike. Cavities of course being the times that you are sampling two or more girls at the same time and they find out about each other…basically a cake sampler is a player, but not quiet the same. He has the intent of settling down with one of the samples, he just can’t make up his mind. Players are just in it for the booty.
So thank you HG for that enlightening outlook on my life.

Tonight Ducky sends me a text message telling me that Eeyore told her that he was higher on my list of importance because he has “parts” that she doesn’t have, or something like that. So at the end of the text she tells me to set him straight. So I couldn’t resist and wrote back saying, “You want that I should tell him you have those parts or that you are higher?” I mean, who could resist that one? Of course I knew what she meant. I told him that she was higher but maybe (and that’s a big maybe) he could move up the totem pole of importance if he put out this weekend. So I didn’t hear back from him for a while but them he IMed me online and we are having friendly banter. He said he was top of the totem pole, if not I could have a nice trip. That was a cheap shot. So I told him he had two options, he could hang out with me and be cooler than Ducky or he could make out with me. He said he wasn’t cool, so I told him that meant we’d have to make out. I mean, he’s got to show he means business here. But then I told him I wouldn’t force people to make out with me just so I would value them more than another person. He didn’t believe me so I told him except that one time I did but I’m a changed person now.

In other news (I told you I have new material, amaza-zing) I think I got asked out again tonight! I hate that I don’t know when it’s happening. This is twice now with the same guy, and now I look like I’m coming up with crap and avoiding it. A couple of weeks ago I wrote about the first time (I think I did) when this guy was the only one who showed up to our preparedness activity and afterwards told me how his date had canceled on him at the last minute for that afternoon and he suddenly said, “Do you want to come?” Smooth, yet not really, all it really did was catch me off guard where I mumbled, or drooled on myself. My sister quickly jumped in explaining that we had already made plans (my sisters, mom and I) so I couldn’t. I told him sorry and felt bad because how many guys from church actually bother? Then tonight this same guy was hanging out extra long at institute, I didn’t think anything of it at the time but I’m beginning to think about it now, they never stay late, B2 even pointed it out that they always leave right away. We were in the parking lot getting ready to all say goodbye and he suddenly spoke up and asked me if I’ve ever played Settlers of Zarahemla, I told him I had played Settlers of Catan before. So then he asked me if I would like to play this Saturday at his house. So I had to tell him I was going to be out of town, but if he wanted to play when I got back that would cool. I personally could care less if we do or not, but I feel bad that I seem to elude him every time. So we’ll see if he drudges up the courage one last time. If not, he goes back to school at the end of the month, so the awkwardness will either pass or he’ll disappear and I won’t have to worry about it. Now if I could just get one of the boys I’m interested in to ask me out…that would be nice.