Chapter 7: You’re Making Me Angry

So today I kept getting calls from my cousin, who isn’t really my cousin but we worked together in high school and everyone always accused us of dating (story of my life) and since we were both vehemently not attracted to each other we started to tell people that we were cousins and that stopped all the harassment. Anyway, so Coz always calls me on Saturday night or Sunday morning to see if I can give a ride to ex-bff (whom I have been friends with since 6th grade and trying to drop since 7th grade) a ride to church. I have finally come to that comfortable place in my life where we share no contact, except for once when she first moved back in town and I was forced to hang out with her. Build some freaking respect for me and first don’t wait until the end of the week to call me and ask me to give your friend a ride to church. Secondly go get a brain at the discount store and realize that I may not want to rekindle this broken friendship, possibly because so much energy was put into breaking it! And since Coz is the handy man for the hell hole I call a home, get me my freaking gutters and fix my bathroom door! If you ask me he better realize how lucky he is that he hasn’t gotten a hold of me because I would probably let him have it! I don’t want to have to calculate the time that it takes to close my bathroom door just so I can make sure I’ll make it to the bathroom! I don’t want to have to tell you that this house needs gutters one more time and you know what? If this house doesn’t have gutters by the first time it rains after April 1st of this coming year then April will be the last month I live here because I choose to live in this house, I’m not forced, it’s not the best deal in town, I’m just wasting money on a place that I don’t even like to live in!
You know what else?! There are a bunch of morons in my house with their dim-witted dance party. A dance party!? Who does that? That’s the stupidest idea in the world! I don’t even like these people; my roommates don’t even want them here, so why do we have to put up with it?
I think that maybe that guy was right and it’s that time of the month, it’s either that or there is a full moon out, because I am so easily pissed off. When I pulled up to my house there were a gazillion cars outside of my house and my roommate was blocking the driveway with her car, there was plenty of room for my car but to get to it I would have to drive through my neighbor’s yard and they get upset when we do that, but it was that or park two blocks away from my house. So I just went as quickly as I could. Luckily no one else thought to do that so there was a space for me
So I came into my room to chill and Diva comes in to hang out. I complain to her for a little bit about everything and we both rip on Coz because he’s metro and he only calls when he wants something. Then Motor Mouth comes in and she is on the phone, I tell her it’s like Luke’s from “Gilmore Girls” and she can’t have a cell phone in my room, because you don’t knock on the door to come in talking on the cell phone. Diva and I were just listening for a second and then I recognize that it’s Coz on the other line so I motion to Motor Mouth that I am not home. She gets a big grin on her face but finally gets it out that she thought I was home, but I must have still been at work. He told her to tell me to give him a call. She said that she’d convince him to get someone who lives closer to ex-bff to give her a ride to church. She asked me something about calling him back and I told her I wasn’t going to unless he wanted to hear me go off about how much he is pissing me off. If he asked me about it at church tomorrow I will just tell him that I didn’t want to talk to him. I don’t pay to have a cell phone so that I can return phone calls, I pay so that I can ignore phone calls, and he happened to be the person of the day that I wanted to ignore. He’ll be the person I ignore every Saturday if that’s how it’s going to be.
Right now I just want these annoying people to go fetch a life and leave my house.
…I’m so anti-social.
Excuse me; I have to go calculate how much time I have before my bladder burst.