Cars, Ponies and the Caste System of Fries

I don’t do sick well. I like to pretend that I do but I don’t. My body completely slows down to lethargic levels when I don’t feel well. I find that my brain can’t focus and I keep thinking I’m forgetting something. I don’t smile as much, I don’t talk as much. I just want to sleep. Right now I have a soar throat, which means that I kind of want to drink a cup of broken shards of glass because that might be more comfortable than how my throat feels right now. I would go ahead and take a PTO day, but what’s the point? I’ll be just as miserable at home as I am right here, but I won’t be wasting a precious PTO day if I just stick it out. Scanning won’t require too much effort from me, so as long as Boss Lady doesn’t have any projects for me I’ll be just fine.

Here’s a old tidbit for you.

In the world of single-tude you have to set up for yourself a system, a hierarchy if you will. I have done this in two ways. In college it was the Matchbox Cars and Ponies. Post college it’s the caste system of fries.

Matchbox Cars and Ponies

When you were a child you wanted a pony, or at least you think you wanted one because all little kids ask for something extravagant like a pony right? So if you didn’t want a pony, but rather wanted a monkey or something else you knew you wouldn’t get then call it that instead. Matchbox cars are more easily accessible, they run about a dollar or less at the store, so if you ask for one of those, chances are you might get one.

How this relates to dating? Think about your list…everyone’s got a list, even if it’s not written down, or thought about often, there is still a list of the basics – what are you looking for? There are things on your list that are “must haves” – i.e. employed (at least that’s one I’m fond of) and then there are things that are “like to haves” – i.e. dark brown hair. The must haves translate into the Matchbox Cars and the like to haves translate into the ponies. I want an employed guy, I can’t settle for unemployed so it’s one of my Matchbox Cars, I happen to be attracted to dark hair guys, but it doesn’t mean I’ll pass up a cute blond either, so it’s a pony. I’m willing to bend on the ponies, but not so much on the Matchboxes. Do you follow?
Try it out; it’s fun to divide your list up into the musts and the nice to haves.

The second thing is the Caste System of Fries. This isn’t so much about a list of a potential boyfriend/husband, but rather a list of men in your life, and how to classify them. In college we did something similar with; “Hot”, “Handsome”, “Cute”, “Funny”, and “Interesting”. “Interesting” because I don’t believe that anyone is ugly…just different or interesting looking. Here are the categories and descriptions within the fry realm.

Cheese Fries – The appetizer, those “fries” (i.e. boys) that are totally cute and fun to be with but are a bit too young for you.

Shoe String Fries – They’re kind of cute, but you don’t really know them yet to put them into another one of the categories.

Steak Fries – Hot….that’s it, just hot.

Seasoned Steak Fries – Not only super cute and attractive but they’ve got personality to boot (which sometimes is the reason they are so attractive).

Seasoned Steak Fries with Fry Sauce – Not only super cute and attractive with personality to boot but also going somewhere. They’ve got it together, a good head on their shoulders. They don’t work retail, or are an aging student. If they’re still in school it’s because high aspirations have kept them as a student in law school, medical school, dental school, etc.

Burnt Fries - Sadly, I had several people listed in this group. Burnt fries are the "no goes". They aren't what you consider to be attractive in appearance or personality. Burnt fries are the things you desperately avoid eating because they're empty calories that leave a funky taste in your mouth. Nothing good can come of burnt fries so be very careful and very sure that you want to place someone in this category.

Any questions?