I'm not a complainer, I'm not a complainer...

Yes I am. And here's why.


First order of business. The dismal state of the kitchen.

Monday, during our snow storm, I got up at the regular time despite the fact that I could have gone back to bed, and I went upstairs and emptied the dishwasher. After emptying it, I loaded it (makes sense). Then I started it because we had so many dishes it constituted a full load. Then I made cookies. I left my dishes in the sink until the dishwasher finished, but by that point I had found other things to do. I assumed (which is wrong I know) that another roommate who had absolutely nothing to do the entire day would find it in their hearts to empty the dishwasher and put their dishes in (they don't even need to put mine in, I'll do that, just theirs). Rather it continued to build. The sad thing is, the only dishes I used were all in a bowl together and I actually didn't use any other dishes from Monday until I used a plate yesterday. And that plate is in my room right now. In the meantime no one emptied the dishwasher. Three days of dishes piling up and there were more being used all the time! I couldn't understand why no one else was emptying it. The sink was packed and the dishes were stacked on the counter!!! Talk about vomit. There were only two of them? How the hell did they get so many dishes (pardon my language)? Anywho, I'm kind of over that because this morning there were no dishes in the sink...but it's not allowed to happen again!!

...I need my own place.

Second order of business. Best Friends.

What is a best friend? What are qualities that are sought after when one seeks a best friend? Does one seek a best friend or do they fall into your lap?


I'm a believer that best friends fall in your lap, or more so they are brought into your life when you need them. But they also have certain qualities that make them stand out more than the other friends. They are more dependable, more apt to fake happiness for you (even if they don't think what you have to be happy about is all that happy), they are good listeners (but you need to be one in return), they think about you even if you aren't there so they call you or e-mail you just to say they miss you, they'll stick with you even when you cry or go into a hermit like state. So many things that a best friend does infinitely better than just a regular friend.


At the same time they tell you what they are thinking, they tell you when you are being stupid. They'll give you advice when they think that's what you want (or sometimes need despite what you think), or they'll keep quiet if they think you just want someone to listen. You can get in a fight with them like you would with your sister (you can yell and scream all you want but in the end you still love each other).


Best friends are a good thing to have, because sometimes you need an extension of your family, and that's what a best friend is, an extension of your family. Maybe not the family you grew up with, but what or whomever you deem your true family to be.


With that said I almost feel like I shouldn't start complaining.


...almost.


I got a call from one of my best friends (and I know there is a joke that I have so many of them, but you must understand I have had many different phases in my life, and each phase required adaptation and most of the times a new best friend). She calls me every so often (as stated above, a best friend calls you when they are randomly thinking of you, even when they are thousands of miles away). I'm the rotten friend because I never call her. But she's still on my "pick up" list and as long as I'm not too busy I do pick up. I even picked up during a regional activity a few weeks ago. Keep in mind (which you couldn't have before but you sure can now) that this is the best friend who I told that we probably wouldn't be best friends in 5 years. She was highly offended and I tried to explain that I was just being a realist. Seriously, we had no intention of even living on the same side of the country and people grow apart. I have never disillusioned myself to believe that these people will actually come visit me, despite any travel arrangements that I make to go see them.


Ranting and rambling but trying to stay focused, bear with me.


Whenever she calls I have begun to notice that it's a short call, when she is driving or is waiting for her husband to come home, and it's to tell me something about her (not a problem, that's what friends do...they listen) ...but that's what friends do...they listen. She doesn't listen, and I don't know if she ever did, but I feel she must have listened before. I've had so many things that I have wanted to tell her before but I can't get a word in. Then last night, she tells me everything that she needs to say and then she says, "So what's new with you?" and I tell her not much. But I think of a few exciting things to tell her and it's almost like there's something/someone in the room with her distracting her from the conversation. Totally disinterested. And it bothered me a little because only a few minutes before I sounded the peppiest I have sounded in a long time while she spouted off random bits of news in her life. She didn't even laugh at my joke I made...I just feel like she wasn't even listening!! Then she says, "OK, well I'm going to let you go." ...okay. I just don't get it...Did she just turn of the switch while I was talking and figured when I grew quiet it was because I was done, so now it's time to hang up? Did I make her angry? Have I changed? Has she? Were we always this way but I just never noticed??

We are coming up on the three year mark...only two more years before my prediction becomes reality, and at this rate I might be right.

Small annoyance....when my boss tells me that I was the one who was in charge of something (such as ordering something) and that item is here and it was brought back in June, but I didn't order it.
Then she says "Don't you remember?" and is getting frustrated like she can't believe that I don't remember and I'm getting nervous because I can't believe she doesn't remember. So I just say, "Yeah I remember".
It's okay...this is life.

Snow Days

Yesterday was a snow day. I didn't think I would ever get one as an adult, but yet there I was. I lived in Idaho for a good four years and survived every winter. I bundled up and walked to class, I drove to the store when necessary, I slipped and fell and laughed at myself countless times. But I have grown soft, and a powdering of snow left me incapacitated. I didn't feel like anything was important enough to venture out into the snow for. I bundled up and forced my dog to go outside to go to the bathroom, but I didn't once set foot in the snow (except for what was built up on the patio, which was a good amount). I didn't want to get snow in between my socks and my shoes, I didn't want the bottoms of my jeans to soak through. I think it was because I knew I wouldn't be able to warm up fast enough in our 60 degree house and with my ever fading heater.

So I was holed up at the house, not a problem at all. I was dressed, I did laundry, I emptied the dishwasher and loaded it, I made cookies, I worked on my story, I talked to Ducky on the phone, I watched Pushing Daisies, I did so, so much of nothingness yesterday and I can't say I hated it. Well, I did begin to hate it around 5 o'clock but my body treats extreme boredom like it treats extreme pain and soon I was knocked unconscious. I woke up and it was dark in my room and I freaked, I didn't know what time it was, what day it was, or anything (this is the reason I don't take naps). The sad part was, the nap was no more than 45 minutes...but it recharged me for another round of nothing.

That's not why I am writing though. The reason I am writing is because I wasn't stuck in the house alone. P.R. and SFHB were also there. Not a problem at first, but time with SFHB quickly becomes one. I really like P.R. I love talking to her and I feel like I can tell her anything, and I do tell her a lot...the only problem is SFHB has super sensitive hearing. So many times when I am telling a story to P.R., SFHB comes down the stairs and says, "What was that?" as though I had been directing my statement to her, when I had not been. I think P.R. realizes that this is a possible issue (and may even be one that bugs her as well) because she never rats me out when instead of repeating what I have said I look at SFHB and say, "Your mom" or some other remark to deter her.

Yesterday however I was on Facebook and I got a text from Ducky asking if I had a moment to chat. She didn't know we had snow and the state closed down...so I called her and she said something funny right off the bat so I was laughing and I hear the little "popping" sound that indicates that someone has IMed me on Facebook, and I look over and it's SFHB and she says, "What are you laughing at?" I wanted to say, "Your mom." but felt I had been over using that one lately, so I ignored her for a while and then just said, "I'm on the phone." Then Ducky was talking about the ghost tour she went on and it was freaking me out so I told her I was going to throw up and SFHB IMed me again and said, "Don't throw up." I wrote back that she was creeping me out and she had to stop. So from that point on I started to talk quieter, and at one point I got up and moved so that I would be in the part of my room that is below Moxie's room. I don't like that she can hear everything so well down in my room and I can't wait until she moves. It was a conversation between my B.F.F. and I and I don't think she should have been listening. If she can hear it then she either ignores it or she turns on the music or the TV. If she had those things on she wouldn't be able to hear me. It just bothered me.

She's lucky I didn't go all "The Shining" on her and whip out my ax...or even a shovel would have done. Unfortunately, as I realized yesterday, we don't seem to own any of these important tools...I'll do my best to rectify that situation before the next snow storm.